p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
