O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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