Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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