brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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