She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
