Duck Duck Cougar?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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