they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
