shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
