I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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