Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
