ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize