What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i will never coherently bang her
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
