i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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