just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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