By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
