covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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