Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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