i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
