mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize