yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
