Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
