I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
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pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
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We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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