Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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