Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
