Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
