Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
