was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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