somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
a search helicopter?!
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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