In the future we'll all be gay
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize