You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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