She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
My day in three words: secret purse cake
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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