I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.