I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
