Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
