Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?