did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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