would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
