He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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