you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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