can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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