so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I checked into jail on foursquare
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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