after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Help me help you realize you are a moron
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
