Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize