I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
