Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
