so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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