I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
