its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
This can only be settled by a dance off.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
