in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
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