he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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